Confessions and Revenge Stories

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Confessions and Revenge Stories

Postby bjr » Fri Nov 30, 2007 10:36 pm

Years ago, when I was in my early twenties, I was dating a guy, who phoned my home when I was at work. Anyway mother took the phone call, and passed on a message, saying I was busy at the time and didn't quite catch it all, but basically he can't pick you up tonight because of something to do with his car.

Anyway I phoned a friend and we decided to go out for a drink. She picked me up and off we went. We pulled into the car park of our Local and there and behold was my chaps car. So furiated I let all four tyres down and went for a drink at another pub.

Next day he phoned, as said "Sorry about last night, but I sold my car and couldn't pick the new one up until the morning".

So I apologise to the person that bought the car and naturally I was too embarrassed to go out with this guy again. :oops: :oops:
To my critics
When I'm in a sober mood, I worry, work and think,
When I'm in a drunken mood, I gamble, play and drink,
But when my moods are over and my time has come to pass,
I hope I'm buried upside down, so the world may kiss my ar*e
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Postby CaptnMorgan » Fri Nov 30, 2007 10:50 pm

LOL!!! bjr, that's not THAT bad!! :lol: :lol: :lol: At least you only let the air out, you didn't slash the tires!!

Back in 1993, the night before my middle brother left for the Army, we all went out cruising the town and shock of all shockers had been drinking. Well, our baby brother was talking about this guy that had been bullying him for quite some time and so we all had our little sayso about Trevor. In a few minutes, they said, CaptnMorgan pull over in the alley, we've got to pee. I did and in about a minute they were running back to the jeep saying GO!! GO!! I was like, uhm, okay and drove off.

They were laughing and laughing and I asked them what. My one brother said that was Trevor's house on the corner and we'd parked in the alley behind his driveway where his big white gooseneck horsetrailer was parked. They said to drive back by on the roadside and I did and in the light of the streetlight you could read "Trevor sucks big green donkey dicks!" written on the side of his trailer in black permanent marker. :lol: :lol: :lol:

I had aided and abedded vandals LOL!!! Well, it wouldn't be so funny if Trevor hadn't been such a prick. He really was, and still is to this day!!! The next morning our mother drove by and saw that too and she came back in the house and told my brother what "someone" had written on the side of his trailer. She didn't know until last Christmas that it was her angelic children that had done that!!! :lol: :lol: :lol:
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Postby doobyscoo » Sat Dec 01, 2007 12:21 am

Doobies confessions.

Mmmmm, here's some short but sweet ones, not really confessions, more like life embarrasments.

1) I hoard compimentary toiletries from hotels and have a large bag full of boxed shower caps that idno't know what to do with.
2) I fancy 'Tyrone' from Coronation Street, much to my partners amusment.
3) At the age of 14, I baby sat for my Aunty's kids, once the kids were in bed I raided the video collection and found a home video of my Aunt and Uncle having sex.
4) I harboured secret fantasies that in the school lunch hall, everybody would start dancing on the table like the 'Kids from Fame''


that'll do for now.................
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Postby toothbrush » Sat Dec 01, 2007 10:56 am

doobyscoo wrote:Doobies confessions.

Mmmmm, here's some short but sweet ones, not really confessions, more like life embarrasments.

1) I hoard compimentary toiletries from hotels and have a large bag full of boxed shower caps that idno't know what to do with.
2) I fancy 'Tyrone' from Coronation Street, much to my partners amusment.
3) At the age of 14, I baby sat for my Aunty's kids, once the kids were in bed I raided the video collection and found a home video of my Aunt and Uncle having sex.
4) I harboured secret fantasies that in the school lunch hall, everybody would start dancing on the table like the 'Kids from Fame''


that'll do for now.................



To me, Tyrone looks very much like Ray Winston when he was in Minder and Robin of Sherwood so about mid-80's. I don't know if that makes you feel a bit better. :D

Number 3 is very disturbing. :shock: Did you watch the whole thing?

I, of course, have led a blameless life. :lol: :lol:
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Postby Mr.Shifter » Sat Dec 01, 2007 11:22 am

[font=Arial]As a child I had to share a bedroom with my sister - she is just one year younger than me. :roll:

She used to annoy me and we'd argue like sisters do. I used to throw things at her when she was asleep just to annoy her and make her 'tell' (in our house we both 'got it' if we told :lol: )

Anyway, one night I threw a battery at her, it hit her on the head :twisted: She squealed and I denied it saying it must have rolled off the shelf above her bed or something. She got in trouble for trying to get me in trouble even though it was my fault.

I still let her take the rap for it even now :D :lol: :D BUT we know the truth so it's a bit more light hearted these days :lol:
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Postby perrito » Sat Dec 01, 2007 5:04 pm

oh dear, I don't think there's enough space for all my confessions :oops:
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Postby CaptnMorgan » Sat Dec 01, 2007 5:47 pm

perrito wrote:oh dear, I don't think there's enough space for all my confessions :oops:


Oh, come on perrito, I imagine that you are an angel :angel4:
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My Friends Confession.

Postby bjr » Sat Dec 01, 2007 10:55 pm

Sorry but she is not computer literature but very good with a phone and only makes calls, so I was telling how the forum was going and what forums we were doing and I told her about this one.

Well her reply was put my confession on please, which is

When her ex-boyfriend told her to get her stuff out of his house (she wasn't living there, she was still at home) because he had found someone else, she sprinkled mustard and cress seeds all over the carpet and sprayed them with a fine mist of water. Apparently he had to replace all carpets as they couldn't stop them growing. Any things did turn out for the best she married him 2yrs later and they have been married now for nearly 25 yrs and have 3 children. And to this day he still thinks it was the girl he found after, which only lasted as few weeks.
To my critics
When I'm in a sober mood, I worry, work and think,
When I'm in a drunken mood, I gamble, play and drink,
But when my moods are over and my time has come to pass,
I hope I'm buried upside down, so the world may kiss my ar*e
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Postby julygirl3210 » Sun Dec 02, 2007 12:32 am

As a kid I used to cut worms up with scissors, and watch the two halves wriggle around.

I used to pick my nose (when I was little), and study and eat the bogies. Ugh. How could I.
"Out damned spot ................" - Macbeth
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Postby julygirl3210 » Sun Dec 02, 2007 12:33 am

Even worse than picking my nose. I have seen the clip of Gordon Brown doing the same thing, on the front Bench in the Commons, live on Television on Prime Ministers Questions, when he was Chancellor.
"Out damned spot ................" - Macbeth
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Postby telegram1 » Sun Dec 02, 2007 11:52 pm

OMG that is so like my confession. My neighbour was being a right pain in the ass with my daughter who was eleven years old at the time. She wouldn't allow my daughter to play on the shared driveway. Anyway, I was sprinkling grass seeds around the lawn but decided to sprinkle some on her newly laid 'quartz stone' bed which ran alongside her side of the driveway. Totally forgot all about it and a few weeks later her driveway looked liked it needed a 'haircut'. Grass was sprouting everywhere!!! I think she knew it was me tho' cos she questioned me about it and I am sure that she was aware of the colour running out of my face as she is a VERY scary woman! I managed to talk my way out of it but I think i will think twice again about getting my revenge from now on.
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Postby sevlow » Mon Dec 03, 2007 3:52 am

In my 20's I went to a dance near a local hospital with a pal. After being refused dances by a stuck-up group of nurses there, we left the dance hall and climbed over the wall of the nurses home just down the road and sprinkled itching powder in the crotches of all the panties hanging on the line.

There was a constant stream of nurses attending the Special Department for the next few weeks.

We dread them finding out that it was us should we ever be a patient at that hospital, I'm sure they would use the bluntest needles they can find and find great joy in administering enemas!
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Postby sevlow » Mon Dec 03, 2007 4:02 am

When my sister and her husband were courting, they went on holiday with Mom and Dad to Great Yarmouth, separate rooms of course. One morning after breakfast Kath and Bill said they were going to get changed for the beach, Mom and Dad continued to talk with people at the next table.

After a while, Mom said she was going to see why they were takiing so long. being suspicious she looked through the keyhole and saw two pairs of interlocked feet obviously enjoying a bit of nookie, she burst into the room yelling "You dirty pair of bu**ers!"

Ooops, wrong couple, wrong room, wrong floor!
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Postby sevlow » Mon Dec 03, 2007 4:14 am

Years later the same sister was telling me about what happened to the works garage mechanic after her skinflint boss who owned an old Rover couldn't start his car one morning so had a neighbour give him a lift to work.

He told the garage mechanic to take the works Daimler and go and fix his car, and that he would find overalls hanging in his garage.

The overalls had a bright yellow patch in the crotch area, and the guy was under the car making adjustments when the bosses sexy wife came home from shopping, she saw the yellow patch and grabbed him there saying "I'm home darling"..

That wasn't the best of it.. the guy sat up so sharply he split his head open on the underside of the car and had to go to hospital to have his head stitched.. the story got round the works in no time, and everybody had a good laugh.
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Postby traveller » Mon Dec 03, 2007 8:48 am

A few years back (don't laugh) I was doing some voulantary work for my DofE awards in an old folks home, I was asked to go round and check in all the rooms to check and replace light bulbs knocked on each door waited and if I got no reply entered. I entered my tenth room and there standing in her birthday suite, drying herself was a dear lady whom i knew well from church as my Bible class teachers mother not a blush on her face me running for cover and her saying its allright, I couldn't look the teacher in the eye for weeks, then she said mum told me about your scare I was red for the rest of the class :oops:
I am still asking, what have you done with your child?
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