Here you will find Doobys Diaries and more. Try your hand at satirical writing and post your masterpiece here


Postby Reggie Dunlop » Tue Apr 29, 2008 4:45 pm

I can't remember if I've posted this before, but hey ....


A philosophy professor stood before his class and had some items in front of him. When the class began, wordlessly he picked up a large empty mayonnaise jar and proceeded to fill it with pebbles, about 5cm in diameter.

He then asked the students if the jar was full, and they agreed that it was.

So the professor then picked up a box of shingle and poured it into the jar. He shook the jar lightly and the shingle, of course, rolled into the open areas between the pebbles.

Again he then asked the students again if the jar was full, and they agreed it was.

The students laughed. The professor then picked up a box of dry sand and poured it into the jar, and shook it, and of course, the sand filled up everything else.

"Now," said the professor, "I want you to recognise that this is your life. The pebbles are the important things - your family, your partner, your health, your children - things that if everything else was lost and only they remained, your life would still be full. The shingle is the other things that matter like your job, your house, your car. The sand is everything else. The small stuff."

"If you put the sand into the jar first, there is no room for the shingle or the pebbles. The same goes for your life. If you spend all your time and energy on the small stuff, you will never have room for the things that are important to you. Pay attention to the things that are critical to your happiness. Play with your children. Take time to get medical checkups. Take your partner out dancing. There will always be time to go to work, clean the house, give a dinner party and fix the disposal."

"Take care of the pebbles first - the things that really matter. Set your priorities. The rest is just sand."

But then...

A student then took the jar which the other students and the professor agreed was full, and proceeded to pour in a can of beer. Of course the beer filled the remaining spaces within the jar making the jar truly full.

The moral of this tale is:

That no matter how full your life is, there is always room for BEER.

(Methinks the McCanns fill their jars first with sand.)
Listen, strange women lyin' in ponds distributin' swords is no basis for a system of government. Supreme executive power derives from a mandate from the masses, not from some farcical aquatic ceremony.

Monty Python and the Holy Grail
User avatar
Reggie Dunlop
Posts: 163
Joined: Thu Dec 13, 2007 11:33 pm

Return to Satirical Comedy Forum: Doobys Diaries and more

Who is online

Users browsing this forum: No registered users and 3 guests